(blog excerpt from April 2009)
Twenty something. The age when quarter life crisis hits us... hard. It is when confusion and frustration in life gets the better of us. We don't know what we want, we don't know what to do, we don't know where to go, and ultimately, we don't know who we are.
Personally, my whole being screams for answers to all my life questions. What's worse, is that I need the answers NOW. In a society where those in the twenty-something generation are expected to be somebody, the pressure becomes tremendous.
I need a career, I need money, I need a fabulous lifestyle, I need a good husband. These are the things that society dictates should define me. Without these factors, I am a NOBODY.
While sitting by my lonesome, I picked up my ipod and listened to Lily Allen's "22"
When she was 22 the future looked bright, but she's nearly 30 now and she's out every night...It's sad but it's true how society says her life is already over, there's nothing to do and there's nothing to say.
Ouch. Depressing. Scary even. When you feel that you are just about one step away from being in a dead end in your life. It's as if you wasted your life on things you thought were valuable and worthwhile just to end up more miserable.
Newsflash: Society says your life is OVER.
Should I then entertain emptiness, loneliness and regrets? I always told myself that there's so much more to my life so I should look forward to it and make myself the best person there is.
But, really, what am I looking for? What should define me?
Is it something? Is it someone? Do I really believe that I would be SOMEONE?
Under the cloud of my confusion and constant prayers for answers, I chanced upon a Passion talk (by Louie Giglio) through a friend who I now consider an angel. Thank you, friend, for sharing this with others.
In Louie Giglio's series called "Lost in Translation", I am defined as a twenty someTHING, but I guess what I really should be is a twenty someONE.
And this is how; through following God and His leading for me in my life. It sounds so vague, I know, but this is how Louie Giglio in his talk puts it.
Sometimes we can be more preoccupied by wanting to have someone in our life than we are in becoming somebody that looks like God. I mean, sometimes we are more preoccupied with getting somewhere in life than becoming someone who looks like our Father. We're more preoccupied by having something in our lives than we are by becoming someone.
True. So true. I am preoccupied by wanting something. It is even harder though because I can't quite put my finger on that THING I am looking for. But this is what shook me up and woke me.
"You come to a point of discovery that I am the THING, that I am the greatest thing EVER that's gonna come along in your life. There is no guy coming along like me. There is no job coming along like me. There is no adventure coming along like me. There is no anything coming along like me. Your heart wasn't made for adventure; your heart wasn't made for money; your heart wasn't made for sex; your heart wasn't made for another person. Your heart was made for Me. And I LOVE YOU, and I will blow you away. I want you to fall in love with Me. To delight yourself in Me." -GOD
Only God can make my life worth something. All He asks of me is to delight myself in Him.
With Him around, my life isn't over at twenty something. It is just beginning. And mind you, what He has to offer me will just BLOW ME AWAY.
I know He will do that for you, too.